Money is the Root of All Evil…
My Mum (and I) was domestically abused by my dad; Robert Brown for 18 years. My Dad; Robert Brown of Low Garleffan Farm; Cumnock died on 8th April 2019 aged 78 years. He was an evil, drug addict; lazy alcoholic who couldn’t read or write and spent most of his days either drinking or passed out in front of the TV. He was prescribed Diazepam for his uncontrollable anger and he was addicted. So; he shouldn’t have been drinking at all. My mum just worked and worked some more. She did all the work on the farm. The farm was both a beef cows and sheep.
The cows were sold because we couldn’t afford the expensive cow feed and there were too many losses. The farm was in debt – The Brown’s were poor farmers. My Mum had married into farming business that had debt and overdraft’s and wasn’t making any money. The family she married into had no money.
I grew up on this tenanted farm owned by The Marquess of Bute Estates.
I have vivid memories from a very young age we had no money and my mum did all the work. I remember one time vividly when my mum had the flu. She was in bed; very ill I was so worried about her and my dad said ‘is that one not going to get up and work’ I was eight at the time.
Back in the 70’s/80’s/90’s tenanted farmers were the ‘poor relations’ in farming circles looked down on by richer ‘land owner’ farmers. Tenanted farms were often run down and in poor repair; the landlords were under no obligation to keep them in acceptable order and some framers lived in poverty.
This has drastically changed in recent years.
My mum left my dad when I was 18. The abuse was horrific and there are somethings’ that happened that I will never speak about. However; I will talk about the incident that led to my mum and I eventually leaving.
As I said my dad was always drunk; either drinking or passed out and popping Diazepam like smarties. He drank whiskey and a large proportion of the food shopping budget when on whiskey (Famous Grouse). There was hell-to-pay if my mum didn’t buy it; regardless of the fact we couldn’t afford it.
Anyway; it was when he was awake and hungover that you had to worry about what would happen next…
On this particular day – he was awake and an argument erupted (as it often did) in the kitchen he would almost on the daily scream and shout at me ‘useless fucker’ ‘waste of space’ ‘retard’. The ‘retard’ one always upset me; I still detest the word.
Anyway; back to this day; my dad would follow up the insults with a ‘get out of my house’ and a ‘you’ll never amount to anything’ again this one really upset me. I struggled at school as I was dyslexic but it was never picked up on, I was just classed as ‘stupid’.
I’ll never understand how people can be so cruel. My Dad had been saying this to me since I was old enough to understand what the words meant. He would also tell my mother he wanted me ‘the fucking retard’ out the house; again; from when I was old enough to understand. For the entirety of my childhood; I genuinely believed that I would need to leave and I had no idea where I was going to go or what would happen from one minute to the next. Similarly; he would tell me that my Mum was abandoning me and that I would need to do all the work as she didn’t want to take me with her. I used to sit on the school bus after school worrying that my Mum wouldn’t be there when I got to the house. I knew no different. I’ve never called a house a home; I’ve never had what I consider a home.
On this day he was drunk and looking for someone to take out his anger on. My Mum was outside working (as always) and I was there. Ordinarily I would have been helping my Mum however my health at this time wasn’t good and this meant I was in the house a lot more than usual. I was diagnosed with Arthritis at 17 and this in effect ended my ‘farming career’ it caused absolute mayhem in the house you would have thought someone had died. I was ‘finished’ and ‘fit-for-nothing’. I was written off; you’re no use to anyone on a farm if you can’t physically do the work. It was the worst time of my life.
My Dad was calling me a ‘useless this and that’ and he wanted me out the house so with me being ill it just gave him more ammunition. However; as I’d got older; I would argue back; it was futile but from previous experience it usually didn’t make matters worse on this day it definitely did…
I’d usually reply by telling him I wasn’t going anywhere and call him an evil old alcoholic. He hated getting called an alcoholic – truth hurts.
The verbal back and forth escalated and in what seemed like a split second he had his hands round my throat and I’m pinned up against the wall in the kitchen. I vividly remember I was on my tip toes; he was screaming in my face… at that my mum walked back in the house. My dad was screaming that he was going to hit me and he wasn’t going to stop… I was screaming ‘to get on with it’ I couldn’t do much else; he was choking me…
And then he just let go… and I dropped onto my heels and I was off…I ran out the door past my mum. I was hysterical; crying and hyperventilating. My mum left him after that; not immediately (that’s very difficult to arrange when you stay on a farm). That incident was just too much for my mum.
Another time I remember was when my Grandparents visited; they visited every Sunday. My Gran was starting to show signs of having Dementia and my dad caused a scene and told my Mum that they weren’t welcome to visit again. He isolated us from family and friends. I even lost touch with my Cousins; the last time I saw them was at my Grandfather’s funeral (my Dad’s father) when I was ten. I was also stopped from going to the Brownies. My Dad told my Mum ‘It wasn’t for people like us’.
My Mum got a house in Cumnock and we moved in. I loved staying there it was so peaceful and quiet. My Mum got involved with her parent’s farm.
Immediately after we left; I cut all contact with my dad. I wanted less than nothing more to do with him. He was as good as dead to me. He went out and bought a brand-new Cherokee Jeep. They were the in thing in farming circles at the time. It raised a few eyebrows as farmers gossiped about my Mum leaving and he’s driving about in his fancy new 4x4 all the while paying zero towards my upkeep. He should have been paying child support as I was in fulltime education and remained in fulltime education until I was 22 (a further 4 years). My Mum divorced him for Unreasonable Behaviour and she got no money from him; in fact; if she had pursued him for what she was entitled to he would have been finished in farming as he would have had nothing left to farm with. My mum just wanted away from him and to be divorced. I got a part-time job.
He told everyone that we had abandoned him ‘for no reason’.
He told my Mum ‘That at the end of the day I would see he wasn’t a bad Dad’ and that he would leave me everything when he died.
Years later I’d heard on the grapevine that my Cousin William was ‘on the scene’ and hanging about with my Dad. He’d showed zero interest in my Dad up to this point; indeed; I hadn’t seen my Cousin since I was about ten; probably at my (our) grandfather’s funeral my Dad’s dad and his Mother’s dad.
It wasn’t long until word circulated that my Cousin was never away from the farm and had pretty much ‘taken over’. It was odd from the point of view that he is renowned in farming circles for being incredibly lazy and liking a drink… apples and trees perhaps???
In 2016 I decided that I needed to establish exactly what the situation was; so; I got back in touch with my cousin. My mum was livid to put it mildly; but I had my reasons. William seemed delighted that I was back in touch.
William was always talking about money and how ‘uncle Bertie’ Robert Brown (my dad) didn’t have any but he chose to look after him anyway. He was also keen to know if I wanted to be reconciled with my dad. At the time my Cousin had a rapidly failing business – a farm park/café business near Catrine in Ayrshire; which had been doing well but wasn’t any more as the brains behind the business (and the money) my Cousin’s wife had recently left him and took her cash and their daughter with her. My Cousin had cheated on her and the whole of the farming community (indeed the West of Scotland) knew about it!
My cousin fancied himself as the ‘man about town’ ‘business owner’ as a farmer who’d ‘successfully diversified’ and a well-known ‘local employer’. When in truth he was doing all that on someone else’s dim; mainly his wife’s… whilst cheating on her… whilst she’s working tirelessly and raising a daughter. My Dad’s family and Daughters don’t seem to go well together; do they?
My cousin William was also obsessed with Auntie Helen (my mum). After the divorce my Mum worked really hard to re-establish herself as a successful farmer and she did and eventually took over her Dad’s farm. She owns this farm. My cousin would remark often ‘your Mum’s farm must be worth a fair bit and you being an only child…’
I can see why he was obsessed with money as he was incapable of making any cash for himself. He was a failed farmer he’d been sent to Private School because he was failing in mainstream school. Possibly his Mum was trying the escape her impoverished roots. The Brown’s had no money they only had debt. My Cousin William couldn’t make the small dairy farm his family had pay; mostly on account of him being incapable of putting the work in. The farm park/café business was successful but everyone knew that his wife was the brains and money behind it; so; when she left and took her cash back that was the writing on the wall for that as well. Again; it was probably too much like hard work and also there was more and more competition opening up in and around Ayrshire. The place now also had a bad reputation from employees as not being a great place to work.
Anyway; my Mum thought very little of him anyway and all this just confirmed to her that she was right. My Dad continued to farm on still at Low Garleffan; Cumnock. He probably continued to drink and pop pills; the Jeep disappeared. His health was now starting to really fail. He did however have a small house which his Mum (my Gran) stayed in - she eventually moved out into sheltered housing and the house was sold. The proceeds from that I’m guessing went in the bank.
Then in 2018 I separated from my husband; I moved back to my home town; my Cousin William said he was glad to see me back…
In April 2019 my Dad; Robert Brown died; he was 78; William never even told me he was ill and in hospital. He’d went into hospital for a routine hernia operation. He took pneumonia and never recovered. So; I was told anyway. My Dad had smoked all his days; was addicted to Diazepam; an alcoholic and had high blood pressure so I don’t see how any operation could be considered ‘routine’ under those circumstances. My Dad should really have been in residential care on account of his failing mental and physical health; social services should have been involved and I firmly believe he was not capable of changing his Will.
Perhaps my Cousin William had a premonition (of impending death) as my Dad’s Will was changed 1 year before in 2018.
The new Will was signed at the farm (a scribble would be nearer it) and was witnessed by only one person – his sister my Aunt Helen; my Cousin’s Mum. My cousin was Power of Attorney and the sole beneficiary of the Will. You could say it was a real cosy family affair.
William phoned me after my dad died to tell me he was dead. I was very upset; apparently; I was grieving for the parent I wished I’d had not the one I actually had. I was invited to the funeral. William also told me there was some of my stuff at my dad’s house and I was welcome to it is I wanted it – my Mum was astounded at the cheek of it… actually embarrassing…
That was done to try and show a united front as obviously William would know that I would very soon find out about the new Will and what him; his mother and my dad had done.
Convenient that:
Power of Attorney – my Cousin William
Sole Benefactor – my Cousin William
Only one witness to the signing of the Will – My Cousin William’s Mother; Helen
Will signed at the farm not in a Lawyer’s Office
No independent witnesses or legal representation.
Speaks for itself – what’s morally right versus what is legally actionable.
Some people are simply driven by greed and have no moral compass; cheating their way through life as they aren’t capable of doing much more.
One thing is for certain my dad was in failing health living like a drunken; drug addict hermit in his own filth. He had mental health problems most of his life and whilst he was an evil domestic abuser; he most certainly would have been eligible for placement in a mental health facility. He would often sit in a chair and just rock back and forward; mumbling to himself all the while drinking; pill popping and that was nearly 30 years ago.
Back then my Mum even managed to organise a Specialist Psychiatrist from a local hospital to see my dad but my dad just said it was everyone else that had ‘a problem’ not him and he refused help. So; to say or maintain that there was a caring element to all this; is simply an attempt to change the overwhelming narrative that this was driven by greed – greed for money.
Lawyers were involved; I asked for a copy of the Will. I got a ‘no’
If you aren’t mentioned in a Will you are not entitled to a copy of a Will even if you’re closely related. The laws on Will’s are totally outdated especially in this day and age when people have zero morals.
(It was up to the Power of Attorney – William) he said no. I made it clear I wanted a copy of the Will. I was quite rightly livid. I eventually got a copy on 2021 – 2 years after my Dad (Robert Brown) died.
The Will was a cheap and nasty effort; beyond basic. Everything was to go to my Cousin William; I didn’t even rate a mention.
I don’t even know the total value of what was inherited. There will be people who do know because no doubt William will have boasted of what he got off his ‘Uncle Bertie’ and how he ripped off his ‘wee Cuz – Hazel’.
My Dad rented his farm and previously I mentioned that all those years ago rented farmers were often seen as the poor relations in farming circles. That was nearly 30 years ago. Times have changed dramatically and the value of land has increased to an exceptional level. As demand outstrips supply; in turn tenanted farms have become more desirable and in turn rents have also increased. The perceived stigma of being in a ‘rented farm’ is all but gone.
Everyone wants to stay in the countryside and a lot of people who don’t come from farming families want to live on farms. Think of all the farming programmes on the TV at the minute. It’s everywhere.
Also; farming has changed dramatically in the past 30 years. Firstly; it’s difficult to make enough money to support a family. 30 years ago; a family farm could support a couple and perhaps 2 sons. Now oftentimes these two sons would need to have other jobs away from the farm to financially support the farm!
So savvy farmers aim to own more than one farm so there is more to pass onto to future generations. If the budget doesn’t stretch to that then farmers will aim to own 1 farm and perhaps rent another 1 or 2 farms in this scenario the two sons would have a rented farm each with the hope that there would be enough equity in the ‘owned farm’ to perhaps buy the rented farms when the time comes to pass on from one generation to the next. I’m putting it in its simplest terms as an example of how it works. There are many other scenarios of how it can work.
In my dad’s case he rented his farm from The Marquess of Bute; and had rented it for decades it was in disrepair as far as I’m aware. Also; my Cousin William spent a great deal of time there and had pretty much ‘taken over’ from what the rumours were saying.
Tenanted farms can pass from one generation to the next and this was common practise. However; landlords were getting wise to this and putting clauses whereby on the death of the named tenant the tenancy would pass back to the landowner’s estate. This meant that they could control the rent charged and pick new tenants on a more regular basis.
In theory the farm Low Garleffan; Cumnock should have passed to me as I was the next generation – indeed a direct descendent and an only child so I was next in line for the tenancy. However; my Cousin William was on the scene the Will had been changed to dis-inherit me. My Cousin William had pretty much moved himself there with his small number of livestock.
The landlord asked me to place a note of interest if I wanted to be considered for the tenancy. I did; however; I found out on good authority that they wanted the farm back. I also found out that my Cousin William had pretty much been told to leave and take his animals with him. However; he was arguing that the Will entitled him to inherit the lease – which would be worth a considerable sum of money. As he would have inherited the cheap rent rate.
The estate took the farm back but not before ‘compensating’ my Cousin William for how much I don’t know; however; there are a few clues.
I got a copy of the ‘moveable assets’ everything that isn’t a fixed asset. On it had my Cousin William’s legal fees for settling this element of the Will - £2591.40. Then there is another figure for fees relating to Fixed Assets which would include the Tenancy - The figure was £3917.50. This would have represented a % of the total value of the inheritable estate; non moveable assets.
So; for example; this amount £3917.50 could have represented somewhere between 3% up to perhaps 5% depending what % fees the lawyers charged - therefore it’s easy to calculate what the 100% was!!! This would represent the ‘compensation’ to take back the lease. Then add that to the total of the moveable assets £103,793.52 which was detailed. For sure some people will know; as boasts are made about ill-gotten gains.
If £3917.50 is 3% then that equals £117,525.00
If £3917.50 is 4% then that equals £156.700.00
If £3917.50 is 5% then that equals £195.875.00
Whatever the figure is then add: £103.793.52 - so a cool Quarter of a Million????
My Cousin William is bereft of morality in more ways than one; he could have done the right thing and righted the wrongs of the past…he could have handed over the lot to me because it should have been mine. Snake… Scum… Parasite… C*nt…
The farming community know what he is; and the local community know what he is. He knows what he is. He has to live with what he has done; he could have easily done the right thing and signed everything over to me or left the Will as it was – whereby I would have rightly inherited everything.
Poison money will ruin his life. Karma…